It doesn't matter why you are reading this, what matters is that you are finally wanting to start loving yourself again. Maybe you just got over a bad breakup where they never treated you the way they should have.
Maybe your mom never seemed to care about you when you were growing up. Or maybe it's just the negative self talk after those mean girls from middle school or high school made fun of you repeatedly.
Learning how to love yourself again won't happen overnight, because chances are you didn't hate yourself overnight either. The years of chronic self-doubt and negativity from others got you to where you are now.
You seem lost. Everything you try just never works out right. Further adding to your self-loathing. I've been there, and part of me still is. Personal growth will take a long time, but hopefully I can share what has helped me grow so you can too!
1. Start complimenting yourself
I used to think compliments could only be from other people. It's why I searched out compliments from others.
If I could start all over again, I would compliment myself. How I feel about myself is more important than how others feel about me. (Reread that once more, because it's that important.)
If you are like me, you probably just rolled your eyes. Compliment myself? Isn't that being a little prideful? The answer is no.
These small little mantras start helping you believe it about yourself.
2. No more comparing
Another super important part of loving yourself again is to stop comparing. Stop comparing your life to someone else's.
If social media is your trigger for comparing your life to those ultra glamorous influencers, take a break!
Most influencers won't show you the ugly side of their lives or the parts that are stressing them out, but believe me they don't have perfect lives either.
3. Surround yourself with positive people
Attitudes are contagious and if you surround yourself with people who are positive that will rub off.
It also goes both ways though. If you have friends who are always downer Debbies, that same attitude could rub off too.
4. Make time for yourself
How do you show people that you love them? Is it by spending time with them? Doing something nice for them?
Well, do something nice for you. Buy a new outfit, just because. Or maybe schedule a relaxing spa day.
It's much more though.
Make time to focus on healthy choices. Going for a walk or meal prep some health meals for the week.
Also, give yourself time to focus on your hobbies.
5. Be honest with yourself and those around you.
Say no when you want to say no. Don't just do something because you want others to like you.
This is the quickest way to losing yourself.
Instead, be honest about things you want to do and things you don't.
6. Give yourself grace.
We are our own biggest critics. Try to give yourself a little grace when things don't go your way.
Embrace your mistakes and learn from them without beating yourself up about them.
7. Make a list of things you like about yourself.
This kind of goes along with complimenting yourself, but make a list of things you like about yourself.
It can be small things or meaningful things, but make the damn list!
As you grow, it might be easier to add things to it.
It's so important to love yourself. It's what allows you to have confidence, and face difficult decisions. It's what helps you overcome anxiety and self-doubt. Most importantly, it's what helps you find yourself again.